The Thief and the Mercenary
by Kainichi
Summary: 100 theme via YuffieXVincent. A description of their love over the years.


The Thief and the Mercenary

1. Hero  
Yuffie was the hero, always swooping in and saving Vincent from himself.

2. Proposition  
Vincent had struggled for weeks with how to confess his feelings to Yuffie, yet she was the one to ask him out with a simple kiss.

3. Fantasy  
Vincent was Yuffie's greatest fantasy; tall, handsome, and infused with materia.

4. Lock and Key  
Vincent had always kept his heart guarded and locked up tight, yet she managed to find the key so easily.

5. Heart  
Yuffie's heart was like a China doll, beautiful, wonderful to own, and so easily shattered.

6. Poison  
Yuffie was the sweetest poison he had ever tasted and he wanted nothing more then to let her break down all of his defenses.

7. Burn  
The first time they kissed Yuffie couldn't help the burning in her cheeks, though Vincent said it just made her look all the more desirable.

8. Panties  
To this day she still refuses to tell him why she owned a pair of pink chocobo panties.

9. Sacrifice  
Yuffie sacrificed a lot for Wutai, but the one thing she wouldn't give up was Vincent.

10. Busted  
Vincent thought he had cured Yuffie of her kleptomania; that is until he caught her stealing a pair of his boxers for a bet.

11. Reflection  
Vincent couldn't get over how beautiful his gauntlet looked when it had Yuffie's face reflected in it.

12. Addicted  
No matter how many times he witnessed it, he always had that sharp intake of breath when Yuffie smiled the smile she reserved just for him. It was intoxicating.

13. Haunted  
Yuffie always found it creepy how Vincent could move around her without out her noticing.

14. Mask  
Yuffie was the one person who could see through the stone mask he had built up over the years and see right to his soul.

15. Stalker  
Vincent always called Yuffie his stalker; how else would she be able to show up right when he needed hug or someone to yell at him? She claimed she was just a good ninja.

16. Web  
Vincent never felt more important than whenever Yuffie came crying to him to squish a spider for her.

17. Storm  
Yuffie was like a big storm; loud, bright, and leaving Vincent unable to sleep

18. I. cant.  
Vincent felt his heart breaking at the sight of her tears and the broken sound of her voice as she uttered those words, "I can't do it anymore…"

19. Mislead  
Yuffie still didn't understand how telling Vincent she wanted him to rub her body with lotion could be misleading. She'd had a sunburn…

20. Memory  
Vincent would never know how hard Yuffie worked to try to replace his memories of _her_.

21. No way out  
It wasn't until Yuffie's father took him into his office and made him fear the man did he realize that there was no escape from the young princess.

22. The old days  
Vincent would often think back to his days in the Turks and his encasement in the coffin and would always be grateful to Hojo for giving him the chance to live long enough to meet the love of his life.

23. Emotional  
When asked what the most annoying thing about Vincent was, Yuffie said without hesitation, "He can be more emotional than a bitch on her period."

24. Come ON!  
Vincent always pretended to be asleep until Yuffie woke up, just so he could her the excitement in her voice as she yelled at him to get up.

25. Chains  
One by one Vincent felt Yuffie's love break away the bondage his sins had enforced on him.

26. Action  
Between saving the world, defeating Sephiroth, and dating a demon-possessed gunslinger, Yuffie never had a moment's rest.

27. Need  
It seemed that everyday his need for her warmth just increased.

28. After A Battle  
Her face was bloodstained and her eyes were a mix of emotions as she stared at the corpse of their latest opponent. It wasn't until then did he realize just how very much he loved her.

29. Gone  
Whenever Vincent would disappear to go on a mission Yuffie would always sleep on the couch, waiting for him to walk through the door.

30. Original Character  
When Vincent suggested that he cut his hair to look like it had when he was a Turk Yuffie had simply smacked him upside the head, declaring that she 'liked her Vinnie the way he was.'

31. Realistic  
Their love was anything but realistic. A hyperactive ninja princess and a stoic gunslinging sinner. Two sides of separate coins. Yet that's what brought them together in the first place.

32. Moonlight  
Vincent always complained when Yuffie dragged him outside in the middle of the night to look at the full moon, even if he did secretly like the way her eyes glowed in the moonlight.

33. Holiday  
Vincent didn't celebrate Christmas, but when he discovered his 'present' lying on his bed it suddenly became his favorite time of year.

34. FUCK  
When Yuffie stubbed her toe and proceeded to say every profanity in the book Vincent decided that she was spending too much time with Cid.

35. Do not disturb  
Vincent never paid much attention to the 'do not disturb' sign that Yuffie had on her dresser until the first time they had a fight and he was left staring at it while locked out of their room.

36. Midnight  
Vincent would often find himself up way past midnight, just so he could watch her as she slept.

37. Weapon  
Watching the loving way that Yuffie would polish and sharpen her weapons was one of Vincent's favorite pastimes.

38. Sick  
Yuffie always thought it was cute how Vincent would freak out over her littlest of colds.

39. Transformation  
Nothing could erase the image from Vincent's mind of Yuffie's horrified face the first time she'd witnessed him take the form of one of his demons.

40. Fear  
Yuffie's biggest fear was of being second to _her_ in Vincent's heart.

41. Under Water  
Yuffie liked to remember their time in the submarine just because she loved the way Vincent had looked with the light falling on him through the water.

42. Future  
As horrible as his past had been, when he saw her smile, he knew that the future held many promises.

43. Fire  
Vincent had decided Yuffie looked best when she was holding a fire material, just because of the way her eyes looked in its glow.

44. Wings  
When Vincent asked Yuffie's opinion of Chaos, all she said was 'He has some bitchin' wings at least.'

45. And?  
Whenever Vincent came back from a mission they had a routine of what to say. "I'm back." – "And?" - "And I missed you." – "And?" - "And I'm sorry I was gone so long." – "And?" – "And I love you." – "Good boy, I love you too."

46. During A Battle  
Even in the course of battle and gunfire Vincent always found himself watching Yuffie's every movement.

47. Text  
When Vincent first got his phone it took his two hours to figure out that the little envelope meant that Yuffie had texted him. It took him another hour to figure out how to text back.

48. Progress  
Whenever people commented on how angsty Vincent was Yuffie would always stop and plant a big kiss on the man and when his cheeks pinkened she would point and declare loudly "Look at the progress I've made! He emotes!"  
Vincent has been secretly paying people to call him 'angsty' in front of her.

49. Upside Down  
Vincent knew she was crazy, but when he walked through the door to find her hanging upside down from a rope attached to the ceiling he decided that she was certifiably insane.

50. Unseen  
One of the best things about being an ex-Turk was being able to sneak up on his little ninja.

51. In the rain  
After Vincent's first disappearance Yuffie found herself standing outside in the rain, staring down the road as if it would make him come back sooner. She stood out there so long, it was hard to tell if rain was the only thing drenching her face.

52. Princess  
Vincent would often forget the he was dating a princess until he had his gun pointed at her latest suitor.

53. Confrontation  
As Vincent laid alone on the couch he was still trying to figure out what he had said to get him banned from his own bed. He would never understand women.

54. Keeping a secret  
They had been lying awake at night when he had whispered the fatal words, "I think I love you."

She had just giggled and said "Don't worry, I won't tell anyone."

55. Quote  
"I was frozen in time, but I feel as if my time is just beginning."

Vincent never understood how he had lived before Yuffie had came into his life.

56. Sharp  
Vincent always hated the sharp tips of his claw…that is until he discovered how useful they were in assisting a certain ninja in removing clothing that were blocking some rather nice visuals.

57. Fading  
It was odd how she found such comfort in the fading colors of his cloak.

58. No Color  
She was his white rose; uniquely beautiful with thorns sharp enough to pierce him completely.

59. Censored  
Vincent never felt more like a pervert than when he had to buy Rated-R movies for Yuffie.

60. River  
Yuffie was like a mythical river spirit; graceful, difficult to capture, and stunning when dripping wet.

61. Message  
Whenever Vincent was lonely on a mission he would pull out his cell phone and listen to Yuffie's voicemails repeatedly.

62. Tattoo  
The night that they first made love Yuffie got to see the inked mark Hojo had left on Vincent, and it, more so than the scars that riddled his form, made her cry.

63. Dirty  
It seemed that the favorite joke among AVALANCHE was about 'the dirty old man and his underage toy'. Vincent didn't find it funny. Yuffie thought it was hilarious.

64. Dinner for two  
When Vincent had come home to find firemen blocking entrance to their kitchen he had looked at Yuffie in alarm. She had just grinned sheepishly and held up a candy bar, "Dinner for two?"

65. What If....  
"What if I lose control of myself to my demons again?"

"What if monkey's flew out of my butt? We'd do the same thing, say 'Oh crap' and call for help."

66. Past  
Yuffie knew about Vincent's past, but that only made her want to make his future even better.

67. Lace  
For their first anniversary Yuffie had dressed up in a lace dress complete with white gloves and pretty stockings. Vincent felt even more like a pedophile than he had during the entire year.

68. Envy  
Yuffie didn't know why she always got jealous whenever Vincent cleaned his guns, it wasn't like she cared that he was giving them so much attention instead of her.

69. Study  
It took several months of study, but Yuffie finally understood that Vincent shrugged a shoulder with a 'Hn' it was basically Emo Vampire for "You're right and I'm too proud to say it out loud".

70. End of the World  
Watching Vincent toss in his sleep as a nightmare attacked his mind with the knowledge that she couldn't do anything was like the end of Yuffie's small world.

71. Cheat  
Yuffie still wouldn't admit that licking someone's neck while they were playing video games was cheating.

72. House on the hill  
Out of all the place Yuffie had ever been, she hated Shinra Mansion the worst because it was a symbol of all the pain that Vincent had gone through.

Out of all the places Vincent had ever been, he loved Shinra Mansion the most because it was the first place he had seen Yuffie's face.

73. Thank you  
The first time Vincent had returned from a mission to find Yuffie asleep on the couch, clutching his picture, he had smiled and picked her up, whispering a soft "Thank you" as he carried her to bed.

74. Tool  
Yuffie had never thought the prospect of having a 'handy-man' to be all that attractive(in fact she found it to be a little sexist) but when she saw Vincent trying on the tool belt Cid had sent him, she suddenly began thinking of the many things to have him fix(most of which weren't even broken yet).

75. Death  
Once a year Vincent would visit Lucrecia's grave to ask for forgiveness, until he went with Yuffie for the final time to ask for her blessing.

76. Give  
Vincent had nothing he could give Yuffie that her suitors couldn't other than his love. When he had told this to Yuffie she had laughed.

"Lucky you, because that's the only thing I want."

77. Bird  
Vincent's heart was like a bird; stunning, hard to catch, and so easily crushed.

78. Fun  
Yuffie never understood how shooting could be fun until Vincent had stood behind her, held her hands holding the gun, and showed her.

79. Honor  
The honor of being a Turk, or of saving the world, or of surviving hell was nothing compared to the honor of being Yuffie's 'Vinnie'.

80. Jewelry  
Yuffie had never been one for jewelry, but she found herself speechless when Vincent latched the silver chain around her neck, his Cerberus charm settling at the base of her throat.

81. Anniversary  
The first time Vincent forgot their anniversary he found himself not only banned from their bed, but from their house altogether. He hasn't forgotten once since then.

82. Coming Home  
Vincent had never knew how happy going home could make a person when they knew they had someone waiting there for them.

83. Chaos  
Yuffie was the one person in the world he knew that could look Chaos in the face and slap him while declaring that she "wanted her Vinnie back and she wanted him _now_".

84. Fashion  
Even though she constantly made fun of his taste in fashion, there was really nothing more that Yuffie loved than wrapping herself in his cloak and inhaling his scent.

85. Wood  
Yuffie always smelled like oak trees. Vincent had no clue why, but he liked it.

86. Drunken  
One of the best things about dating Vincent, Yuffie had decided, was that he was of age to buy her alcohol. Vincent felt used.

87. Rape  
The morning after they'd first made love Vincent found himself wondering if Wutai had charges for statutory.

88. Bunny  
Yuffie still teases him about the time he got a bloody nose when he saw her dressed as rabbit when she went trick-or-treating with Denzel and Marlene.

89. Breakfast  
The first time Yuffie had ever managed to cook without burning the house down was also the day that Vincent found out you could get food poisoning from bacon and eggs.

90. Eventually  
Vincent once asked Yuffie if she would ever return all the materia she had stolen. She'd only shrugged while muttering 'Eventually.'

91. Scar  
Vincent had thought scars didn't bother him anymore. That is, until he saw the one slashed across the bottom of Yuffie's shoulder blades, marring her beautiful skin.

"The war left no one undamaged."

92. Redesign  
Vincent thought he was going to have a heart attack when he discovered that Yuffie had completely redecorated their bedroom while he had been away on a mission. He was getting too old for this…

93. Fast  
Vincent was amazed at how fast he found himself falling for her and even more amazed at how much he enjoyed it.

94. Blood  
Yuffie had always thought Vincent's eyes looked like freshly shed blood. For some reason that made them all the more beautiful.

95. Sparkle  
Okay, Yuffie will admit that she was probably exaggerating when she told people that there were sparkles the first time she saw Vincent smile.

96. X (marks the spot)  
One day Yuffie had walked up to Vincent and, without warning, drawn an X across his lips with a (thankfully non-permanent) marker. In response to his shocked stare she grinned. "There, now I can always find my treasure."

97. Identity  
Vincent. Mr. Valentine. Vince. Dr. Valentine's kid. Vampy. Vincent had been known by many things throughout his life, but the only title he ever really cared about he was only called by one person. Vinnie.

98. Move  
Yuffie was incredibly stubborn about a lot of things. How she liked her eggs, where she stashed her materia, and how Vincent had to come to her for their reunion kisses.

99. Space  
People often commented on how Vincent didn't let anyone but Yuffie invade his personal space. When Yuffie heard this she could only remark that 'Vinnie doesn't have personal space, he has Yuffie Space' and so of course only she's allowed to enter it.

100. Alone  
Yuffie hated being alone, but lucky for her Vincent hated being without Yuffie.

--

Kainichi: Hey, first story of the new year! Just wanted to let you guys know I'm not dead. ^^ Written at 3 a.m. Please forgive the lameness.


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